So 16th March 2022 about 00:00am I got the Google Notification that it’s “E-Baba’s Birthday”. For those of you who have not read the previous articles I wrote on E-Baba, he is my paternal Uncle having very high moral grounds in my perception.
With the notification came a moral dilemma, should I even wish him or not?
I know wishing any person on his/her birthday is a positive social activity. But to wish E-Baba there are various Caveat attached. The most prominent one was that I was somewhat angry with him myself. Don’t get me wrong, he still holds a high moral value as a perceptive being. But his clashes with his own family made him choose an action in the past where he left everyone hanging dry. His side of the story is true that he was hurt. But hurt people hurt other people, consciously or unconsciously. Thus when he had fought with his brothers and left the main house, there was no fault of us at that time, that we deserve his isolation. And for leaving me as a kid, unguided, that really made me angry.
In later years, due to good circumstances, now that he is making his efforts to re-console with his brothers and sharing happy memories of them being together, this, in turn, made me angrier. That, “all the years of anger that I had held on to, was that of no use or no worth”?
Watching this movie “The Adam Project” I was able to have another perception of myself. In a conversion in this movie, (exactly at the time of this picture above) it is expressed that we tend to be angry when we grow up, or tend to, not because we are really angry. But in fact, because we are sad. It is easier to be ‘Angry’ than to be ‘Sad’. To mourne from our pain and then to recover. Is easier to blame others and tend to relive the made-up stories than to face the hurtful truth. Since this whole month I am trying to accept my own one truth after another, so thought why not give this theory a chance too.
Instead of being angrier about E-Baba’s constantly changing actions, let’s consider him as a normal human being. A human being who makes mistakes.
And when I think it that way, I am able to think one step ahead of that where I was stuck all these years. And that is, We tend to accept the mistakes of people we love. Or in other words, we tend to ignore the mistakes of people we love and accept the person as a whole being. And whenever we are not able to accept a person as a whole, that is only because we are not able to ignore the mistakes that the person has done to us.
There again comes a choice in the present moment, when we are all alive, Not in memories but here in flesh and blood. Time for new bonds, time for new memories, time for new fights, and time for new love. I think I can get past this mental stuck and move in a new direction. Not a right or wrong direction, as no one could judge where our future lies. But at least one step ahead of our past stuck.
So somehow grabbed the number from my cousin’s sister and texted him, “Happy Birthday“
Unfortunately, this is not a complete story as it is rolling on this present timeline, thus even I don’t know where my or others’ actions will lead in the future, but till that time when my heart beats more than normal that compel me to write more about E-Baba, I can only Say it is “To Be Continued….”
See you in the next post or next life, whichever comes earlier.
Signing off for now