Untold Story Post 85: Theory of Nothing

Somewhere, sometime in my life, someone said, “If you do nothing, nothing will happen.”

I was amused by the deep thought with what the author has said this. I loved it probably more than you did while reading it now, maybe because I was high on weed.

Now that I am sober and re-think the same above quote, it gives me quite a shock on a daily basis.

Thus every day I wake up.

Make up a Task list.

And do my best to complete the maximum task on this list.

Seldom I hit 100% completion and those days I could would or be able to sleep at night properly.

Rest of the Days I think I did not live my life to the fullest.

Out of the blue, I gazed upon an offer on Gumtree. (gumtree.com.au is a website in Australia where people advertise to sell the things they have). I saw A box of books for AU $ 20. I scrolled the post and thought one day! One day even I will have a library of fiction & nonfiction books, at my house.

Then again in my head, I came upon the same thoughts about the Theory Of Nothing: As if you do nothing. Nothing will happen.

Thus I did something.

And results are the two pictures of this post.

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Though a small start but Today I do have a mini library at home.

This task was not on my daily task list but I just followed my instincts or the words of some random stranger in the past which changed my thinking to initiate an action plan in the present.

Reflecting on my day, I think I beat up procrastination, laziness and put on action to execute something beautiful.

Then again when I told this story my cousin with a similar photograph as above, then she said, “Congratulations on Buying them but will you ever be able to read them at all?”

I dogged the question in reply explaining it in Aussi dry humor that “they are part of my retirement plan.”

But in reality, the Theory of Nothing is ringing more like Jingle Bells on a Christmas night.

“If you do nothing, Then Nothing will HAPPEN.”

 

#tapishdongre #utsp

Untold Stories Post 82: Muze Mummy K Pass Jana Hai (I want my mommy)

 

Don’t blame the Mom, it was an accident. It can happen to anyone. Unfortunate but true.
Don’t blame the Child, he was just curious to see the world. Excited, lost, but dint even realised when it happen.

The baby who can walk now, lost his attention along with the small palm grip he had with his mother.

Walked towards the most colourful distraction he could see in Super-Market as big as the whole word to him.

In this process forgot that his mother warned him multiple times, “do not ever leave my hand”.

The small soul started his journey towards exploration of the treasures what the world had for him.

Reaching to this magnificent destination, the child realised the mother’s warning.
But till this time, he is so away from his mother that finding path back to her on his own, seems to be an impossible task on its own.

The Baby did the best he could. Remembered the path he came from. Walked on it for so long. And finally came to conclusion. His has lost his mother.

Tears rolled down inside of him before it could be expressed on his face. He cried, yes because it was allowed, that’s what a baby can do.

Watching the baby alone, people nearby started to wonder. Not all came for help but one. She was a brave soul. Could understand the pain that baby is going through.

Picked him and asked, “Are you lost? Where is your mother? How dose she look like? Let me help you finding her.”

The baby felt relaxed for the first time. An assurance that he could be re-united with his mother.
An hope that everything will be alright again. With this hope and clearing his own cloudy thoughts, the child tried his best to answer the stranger about his mom.

The stranger woman did everything the best she could do. To sooth the baby’s life, few movements, for how so ever short it may be, count that time as life as true.

She gave him two toys to pay with. The baby was both happy and thankful for the gratitude. But only moments later he cried again and said,
“MUZE MUMMY KE PAAS JANA HAI” ( I want to go to my mother.)

The Woman tried every thing in her power to search for his mother. Told others, went on places the baby described and finally made a public announcement.
She will be waiting in a designated place along with the baby and urged the mother to please come and meet us there.

Baby had the stranger woman, her sympathy, her company and the two very beautiful toys she gave him. But the baby still cried, and shouted, “Muze Mummy K Paas Jana Hai.”

That was a long wait, a very long one, but finally on the designated place, a woman came running with tears on her eyes. She couldn’t take her breath properly, but she held on to her faith.
The baby said, “MUMMA” and they hugged each other.

I don’t remember properly what happen next. I know I am just a narrator of this story but no one told me in detail. As It has already been more than 30 years to this story.

The walking baby has grown up to be the perfect man. Explored the real world bigger than the Supermarket of his childhood. Met the another strange woman of his life who had enough empathy to commit life together with him.

Gave him two magnificent Kids that he never required another toy. He was happy. Living the perfect life.
And One unfortunate Day, his mother Closed her eyes.

Even at age 30, he was still a child.
Tears rolled inside of him before his eyes could shine.
He was quite this time to watch his mother go.
Few people around him who could actually know,
Whats going in his heart he wanted to say out a loud.
Even after years he had the same words in his mouth,

“Muze Mummy Ke Pass Jana Hai”
(I want my mommy.)

#tapishdongre #untoldstories #utsp
(Inspired by recent events in life of my former boss and very close friend. May his mother’s Soul rest in Peace. She was really a wonderful woman, I spend few meaningful chats with. And I actually cried before writing this story and again while reading the draft.)

Untold Stories Post 81: THE BROKEN ENGINEER

My Engineering lifespan of four years was a journey along with roller-coaster of emotions.

Girls biologically wired to cope up with emotions, having this as their strong suit, could choose the practical decisions on their own.

Boys on the other hand needed a support group, which they even fail to admit that it is a support group.

The incidents I am quoting are not always alcohol induced, but alcohol did open up some strong men’s heart which left them to crying on the floor. I would not like to mention any
names of this article for the reason that I fail to get their permission yet to share their part of story. So these incidents only form my my point of view.

Scene 1:
First and second year of engineering everyone tries their best to accommodate and live with the new environment which they are forced into.
Not everyone is accustomed to live away form their respective parents.
At that time, may be due to my rebellious age I would love to live away from my parents and have less of a control of them over me.
But some of the boys were connected to their parents in a very very deep and complicated bond that only they could express.

I went to a house party.

Ya because in Engineering life, every day is Party.

Ohh ! I am sorry Every night is party and every day is a kind of sleepover.
In this party a new song got trending.

And with a very slow dial up or mobile internet connection at time this was downloaded the with high definition video of “YOU CAN PUT THAT BLAME OF ME”
by Ackon.
We watched the song once.
We watched the song twice.
and then thrice.
Goosebumps were running on the lyrics,

“Sorry for the times I left you home,

I was on the road and you were alone”

And all of a sudden may be the desi guy finally understood the English lyrics and started crying.
He just went on that he misses his mom and now want to just go home for good.
I was astonished to see such a strong personality breaking down in front of me and weeping, sitting outside of house, not bothering to observe the strange world which in constant caution he did before. I was not a emotional supporter and thus could not help the guy, but that day I was thankful that I am still living with my parents. And I was not sure what would be my go when I had to leave away. (*fast forward to year 2013 when I had to live alone, I did cry, but that story for some other time)

Scene 2:
This was just past the Final year Engineering life and I was invited to another party.

This time it was booze and chicken and what not in the house.

One of the reason was, though not by 9 to 5 jobs but street smart Engineers in their final year and beyond, learn their way to gain income through various objectionable mediums.
Those time the song, “Tera Pyaar Pyaar Pyaar Hooka Baar” form Khiladi 786 was released and I asked for if I can have Sheesha instead of drinking.
Truly speaking till this day I never like alcohol. I am just a social drinker who like to loose control once in a while.

Since I was not drinking I became the judge of two heavy drinkers of that group. The completion was who can have and handle maximum amount of alcohol.
One of the player was very dear friend of mine and other was a Super Senior.

“Super Senior” as if it is even a word.

But we use to believe anyone who is more than two academic
batches ahead of is a Super Senior.

They Drank almost one and half bottle of Whiskey “McDowell’s No. 1” and discussion turns to arguments and then crossed the stage of apologies. Finally the Super senior broke heavy.
He started crying out a loud, “What a waste of life we have become. Four Years of Engineering academic course and its been 7 years for me and still not completed these stupid fucking semesters. Still taking money from my parents. I should die of shame.”

That day I realised though outside we can pretend to be strong on our failures but inside the failures eat you out alive. And for an Engineer, the worst part is
taking money from parents. They internally feel loss of  self respect if they continue doing it after certain years. But in a non- induce stage wont admit it openly.
Dr. Phill calls this stage and behaviour as “Moochers” And I am sorry to admit that for more than 22 years of my life I was one. But that night I decided, doesn’t matter what,
I will find a job, I would clean someone’s house but will not live a Moochers life. (*fast forward, I still owe a lot of sum to my parents but I believe I am off the mooching ground)

Scene 3:
People say keep the best for the last.
But I would keep a very ordinary story to dilute the emotions we had in previous scenario.
I am not even evolved in this story. Thus presenting to you in the form I perceived it form the closest friend.
It was time of campus section. A process where companies come to University and take the brightest mind to work with them. That means for selected few, you will end up with a job right after you have completed your degree. Being the first batch in Biotechnology our college fail to create a carrier show for us. But with enough struggle manage to get one company to interview us.
(I was in a different state of India and focused that I need to perceive a higher education and thus decided not to for this campus event).
My friends who went there were sitting outside for hours before their interview and in contact with me by telephonic conversion through sms.
Only one or two people in that group were given adequate soft skill training about the interview.

The package was in the range of 8 to 12 thousand rupees per month. Which was definitely way too less than expectation of Engineering Graduate. People with soft skill taring have the idea of how to respond to the question “Are YOU happy with the SALARY package offered?”
And if you want that as your first job without having the necessary training for the job, the answer should be “YES”

But one candidate who knew this information started discussing outside, before the interview, and also influenced the interview seekers outside that the salary package offered is very low.
Lets all demand for making this salary package at least up to in the range of 16 to 20 thousand per month.
If we all demand for a higher salary, we will push the economy high and the company has to accept us with giving us an higher salary package.

At this point I would say, WOW ! and Excellent move. Forcing the company to actually provide the acknowledge pay rate to every employee and set the bar high.

Few hours later I was again dazzled by the information, that company only selected few candidates who said they are happy with the salary package they offered.
And rejected all who went against and demand more money to do this job with a pay raise.
The shocking part was, The candidate who influenced everyone to ask for raise actually said “YES” for the pay offered and got selected.

The lesson learned that day was, “THE DAY OF ENGINEERING ARE OVER” and “FRIENDSHIP VALUES HAVE BEEN CHANGED”

WELCOME TO THE NEW WORLD.

Untold Stories Post (UTSP) 80: Marvel vs DC = Fictional Neutral Post

Stories were, are and hopefully will be my passion that motivates me time to time.

With my previous mention on multiple occasions, this must have come across that in current generation of Fiction Wars, I am a super Marvel Fan.

This gives me a strange opportunity to randomly meet strangers and connect with them sharing the same love for stories.

In my understanding Marvel has reached up to that limit where ancient literature like “Ramayana and Mahabharata” would have reached.

The character depth, story cross connection, multiple language translation, huge roll over of currency and love are the common factors I could get comparing various literature and Marvel universe.

I even observed that there is No Particular GOOD or EVIL permanent state of a character.

Dead-pool being the Villain of X-Men series is now a Hero having his own franchise.

Venom being villain in Spider-man series is now a comparative Good character according to 2018 story line.

This was similar to Ravana begin the Villain of Ramayana but later fiction, more research and ongoing work presented him as a good  devotee of God (Not that bad Man then).

Krishna being the super hero, smiled as Gandhari’s son death and sentenced to internal curse. (Bad present inside Good)

I can comment more by comparing Greek Stories and Bible or Quran, but at last results the same purpose. Stories to teach a lesson, to inspire, to learn, to entertain, to fear, to laugh and to connect with similar or dissimilar mentalities over the globe (and hopefully beyond).

Yes UTSP is mostly about personal experience with day to day scenario, thus let me divert in the above comparison and tell you another story.

I was working in Sun-corp Stadium and I met a guy who was leading the food retail team on that particular day. We started talking about fiction stories and then he said, he is a DC fan thus he is waiting for AQUA MAN release this year.

I replied I am as eager as he is, but I am also interested in next edition of Infinity War (which is Marvel Based story-line).

Suddenly he was firm and said, I don’t watch Marvel movies BECAUSE I am DC fan. The discussion went on and on about Marvel and DC.

Late coming home I realized, Fuck the shit.. I love both Marvel and DC. Being one’s fan docent mean I hate the others.

Many days later when I was watching the 2018 Venom, I meat a Marvel fan who hated DC fictions up to an extent that he would not support even the release of AQUA MAN.

And the next step I am doing in this post might be controversial but pattern seems to be true at my current understanding.

I am trying to develop pattern or similarities between religion and fiction. (Both having its followers, preachers, as well as extremist)

More I met with people I gained info that People following Marvel in general avoid DC and vice a versa.
Similarly people following one religion or faith try to avoid lessons and practices from other. And Extremist even try to pin down the non-followers of their own kind.

The time I was most glad was, while meeting people who believe in Peaceful co-existence. The people who like to put Political, Racial, Linguistic and Religions barriers aside and share a Smile together.

Being Atheist (agnostic actually) and Religion neutral gave me access and acceptance to people from all religion. And being Fiction Neutral gave me the entertainment from all over the industry.

And thus I even hope to meet more and more people who are able to keep the FICTIONAL FOLLOWER barriers aside and give chance to be entertain from more and more and stories, let that be from DC, Marvel or even M. Night Shyamalan’s Unbreakable Universe.

Who knows I might create a new genre in future years to have a fan following. But in all case, Do love each other, and Keep each others happy. Let only the Fictional Characters Fight. 🙂 We as humans can co-exist.!!!!

#utsp #tapishdongre

Untold Story Post 79: Accepting Imperfection (ENGINEERING VERSION)

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In Year 2013 I came to Australia and the first ever Job I could land with was for Nikesh Patel in Hospitality Industry as a House Keeper in Oxygen Apartments Brisbane.
In the start I was ashamed to join the job as the fake “ENGINEERING PRIDE” was stopping me from accepting the reality of life.

Engineering Pride is most common stigma in India and that is because “ENGINEERING” is a reputed Degree, but way more Engineers get their Degree every year than the number of Engineering Jobs available.

Thus Engineers are Forced to work in a Industry where they had no prior knowledge or skills about the Industry. And Since no skills are installed in the Engineers they had to start with very low position with minimum wage jobs. Another common
thing Engineers do is to compare their success with the Top Notches Academic Student of their own batch and live in self Guilt of underachievement. These two forces of “low start” and “underachievement” along with the socio-logical pressure
coming from society accounts for “ENGINEERING PRIDE” self implying that, “the job offer in Hand is below my dignity to work”.

Thus in My case I was a Bachelors in Technology in Biotechnology and Housekeeper in Hospitality Industry basically means a clearer. Thus mentally it was me going down certain level of work ethics (which I had none to start with).

But when there was last $160 left in account and
a decision to make weather to pay the $155 Rent or Buy Bread for the week, working for the Job Offer in had was a no brainier choice. During those weeks I was so ashamed of myself that I decided not to declare what I was working as to my friends, relatives and even to my own family. It took me years to get out of the “Engineering Pride” and then set my life progress accepting the reality of life, learning more skills to gain different variety of jobs and keep uplifting yourself time to time.

In the mid year 2014 – 2015 I met with my 2nd boss Mazin Albassit, in the same Industry and fortunately same venue. And Since this time I had the skills and experience already, so convincing him to get the job offer was very easy than the initial struggle I had in year 2013.

Then came the second stage of learning work ethics which is called “KNOWING YOURSELF”

I remember in the start of days of his business days Mazin was so focused that he spent time to understand the working style of each and every staff he had. He concentrated and spent time for continuous improvement of every individual and whole team under his supervision. I sometimes still hear good stories about him that how he went out of the way to take a step further and help his staff when they needed of him.

One of the one to one meeting I had about self reflection changed the way and direction of the work culture I got exposed to. I remember this meeting word to word as if it had just happen yesterday.

He sat with me with a pen an paper, and explained to me how I would understand the concept of Industry where we were working at that stage. He drew a straight line in between two points saying “Thats an Ideal work position and working culture where only Robots can work. With 100 percent accuracy and consuming the least amount of time.” Then he draw a parabola meeting the same starting and ending point, saying, “this is your working style, you want to achieve the perfection and therefore consume a tremendous amount of time to achieve that.” Then he drew a Diagonal line from the starting point to a random interference in my parabola which dint even touch the ending point. He continued, “You are a human. Learn to accept that. This is where I want to you work. Consume a moderate amount of time and finish all task in had for the day. Sometimes it is OK to forgive yourself for not achieving the perfection you aimed for. We all will achieve the Perfection one day with more practice and more and persistence, but today is the day where if you invest all the time one task you may never be able to complete all what you have in your hand for the day. Thus believe in yourself and learn to accept minute imperfections in life as well as your work”

The results of that meeting dint get immediate affect but eventually I was able to absorb the learning value of what was been taught to me that day. Since childhood in India academically we are so forced and focused to achieve the 100% result in life that we fail to accept or even appropriate the imperfection.

Your academic life goes in aiming for getting 100 out of 100 marks the field that you fail to observe that only one or two students in each batch actually made to nearest 90% of that academic culture and rest all are between range of some of self guilt, jealousy, comparative nature, and non acceptance of reality of their result.
In our minds the person achieving nearest to perfection becomes a hero that we fail to support our own mates who couldn’t even pass the examination. I am not demeaning the high scores for their academic excellence but I am just appreciating the existence and acknowledgement of all the students who could not come under the perfection bracket.

The same academic culture we try to implement in our working ethics and thus live in the same guilt of not achieving perfection or comparing our misery with the top notches of your surrounding who could achieve that perfection. Thus Knowing, acknowledging and accepting yourself is important and accepting imperfection is way more important.

With the Guidance in my work culture, I definitely did not transform into Steve Jobs or ended up having the urge/need for end to end control and coming up with a great product like “APPLE”. But, I was and I am “Tapish Dongre” somewhere in between Steve Jobs and Bill Gates work ethics and positive that one day I will make a recognisable contribution in the world.

Only because of past experience and learning with different teachers in life, when I was given a position to run a team, I could accept the imperfection among individuals in my team
without getting mad on my team members or myself, learned to move on, complete the task and be ready for(if) I get another day in hand.

With this hope I sign off believing in Mazin Albassit words that, “Yes one day we will achieve perfection but today is the day to accept who you are and complete the task for the day.” You may never have a tommrow.

Have a Great Imperfect Day Guys
#tapishdongre #utsp

UTSP 78: The Thin Light Air

 

This Story won’t teach anything Good. In fact it is the opposite of Good. Thus not sharing names for this story at all.

In India, a Holiday is celebrated called “Holi” which is festival of Colours for Kids, Fire & Crackers for Young Adult and Food, sweet and drinks for the Adults. But another class of age group comes in between the Responsible Adult and Young Adults who celebrates this festival in unique manner than others listed above.

So weeks before this festival in the year 2009-10, I was in mid of my Engineering and in those days living away form the family gave extra freedom that give you wings. I did not have a television neither a laptop on those days so whenever I feel extremely bored I use to hit off to my neighbour’s house where bunch of more College mates use to live.

They had a 19 inch CRT display TV and in those days that was enough to keep more people inside the house than outside. One such night I went to their house and the house was unexpectedly quite. Only two guys chilling out and watching news with mid loud volume. We never watched News unless something exciting is going around and Zee/Star News people are presenting the story with extra spice than its required.

Suddenly both the guys started laughing very slowly.
I watched there was nothing funny on the news channel…still I thought let me continue to watch what’s the funny thing about?
Then the two guys started laughing more..

I imagine and asked “are you guys laughing on me??? I am looking odd??”

I looked myself in the mirror hanging on the cracked wall, and saw I looked awesome. I had the confidence of a stud that if I go out and say hi to girls outside at least 8 out of 10 will reply me back.

I said, “fuck you guys”.

They started laughing more and more.

I enquired what’s wrong with you what are you laughing at?
In the mean time they laughed so hard that they couldn’t even listen what I was talking.

They laughed uncontrollably.

I said screw you guys and I left the House. Saying “fucking crazy people.”

Weeks later I came to know they had their first “ joint” on that day.

After that I wanted to know what is the feeling like? Why they couldn’t stop laughing and curiosity shifted from what the were laughing on to, to what I would be laughing at when I have my First.

Later the same year on my Birthday I did have my First Joint. I remember I was laughing so hard for no reason and my cheek was like hanged on laughter mode that it hurt-ed to bring back to normal mode. I fought with my Girlfriend for no reason, and next day work up with a huge Hangover and Hunger to eat more and more. Ya everyone tells you not to smoke weed, no one tells you the side effect.

The end of Engineering had series of fortunate and unfortunate but unforgettable events, and as I said nothing good can be learned from this post and in fact that post is opposite of good. But opposite of good doesn’t necessary means bad. It’s not always white and black and sometimes a grey area in the story and life too. (Apart from where I saw my house door moving everywhere and I couldn’t find the way out 😉 )

So by my personal experience I would say that Drug Abuse is definitely bad, but if you know your limit and have control over your risk factors then getting high on a small dosage is not extremely bad either.

Story about the two guys who got high on my neighbour house is, for one who could controlled it got in a stable life and made the most out of it, the other one who could not, unfortunately lost his place of residence, lost his continuity of education for a while but still getting back on his carrier as of year 2018. But I am sure they both have interesting versions of their story when they were high.

Signing off for now
Ex Stoner (or future ex – stoner)
And Yours truly

#tapishdongre #utsp #engineeringlife #vip

Untold Stories Post 76: The Book

 

Only For You Sanmit Ambekar, this will be small post.

So on a random day, I walked down the platform number 5 at Central Railways Station Brisbane, Queensland, Australia to catch Ipswich lane which will lead me to my home in Toowong.
There were more than 50 people waiting for train on either side, but being writer myself I gazed upon a reader. A girl in her late 20’s, blond, slim in a blue dress with lily flower print on it, not covering her legs even when there is winter here.
She had a massive, book on her lap and was reading it with a constant gaze that the outside world dose not matter to her anymore.

I looked on display screen and it says that my train will be arriving in next 7 minutes. I know looking back to girl would be awkward as one you don’t stare at random girls even if they are cute, especially when you are married yourself 😉 .
And two that while you are watching someone there is always a possibility that someone is watching you. I hope the later someone is not a teen with his mobile camera ‘on’ shooting a per-vi-writer cum observer before he publishes his UTSP the following week.

But curiosity killed the cat and my eyes gazed back to the reader girl. I have no clue what she was reading, but I saw a tear coming down her left eye. She was crying while reading a book.!!!!!

Just in that moment, time froze for me. I went on a day dream to appreciate the artist who wrote the book. I still don’t know the book and I still don’t know the writer either but I could imagine the power of the words that a human can
fill in the white pages that can create an emotional turbulence in another human. Words are like power used in a right way can connect to you, doesn’t matter you are sitting right next to me, or oceans apart or even separated by time or generations.

On that frozen time I thought about myself, that would I ever be able to reach up to that level that I can create any emotion impact on my readers. The Tear being a powerful expression of emotion, but joy, fear, anger, anticipation, disappointment, and other various emotions including the “puzzle” what Sanmit Ambekar might be feeling that the story was promised small, but this guy doesn’t seem to stop writing at all.

I wondered would I ever be able to create an emotion with my writing, and if I could, that day I would consider myself paving my first brick in the world of successful writers.

But til then Keep enjoying small stories I write, and Sanmit Ambekar, I cant promise the next one would be a small story, but I am sure it will be an interesting one.

#utsp #tapishdongre

P.S: I did catch my train on time
P.S: The girl closed the book and walked up to the same trian as me.
P.S: If the girl in Blue reads my this post, could you please tell me the name of the book???

Untold Stories Post 75: Some Thing Like a Phenomenon

I have literally stopped writing UTSP a month before I was planning my trip to India in June 2017. Thus I thought If I would like to start writing again, I should start where I left. This UTSP is a personal page from my dairy written on 26th June 2017.

If this is the first time you are reading my written Untold Stories, then you can catch the previous one’s on my website tapishdongre.com and you can get all the updates of my future work by liking my page on fb. So Lets Begin….again…..

Personal Insecurity : a FORGOTTEN FEELING

This has happen before, and the long forgotten feeling came back.
In our engineering days, there was a phenomenon which use to occur again and again and again. And when so many again are used in a single sentence, its time to give the phenomenon a name, and the name is PARTIAL CONCENTRATION.

Anu (now my wife) and I use to have multiple telephonic conversation in our engineering days, Thanks to wireless mobile communication technology that love stories in early 2000’s had the advantage to verbal communicate frequently. And adding cheery to on top of the cake were “HAPPY HOURS” by the network company called AIRTEL, NIGHT CALLING by IDEA and 24×7 free calling by RELIANCE CDMA.

But though technology is aiding to the love stories, the human mind, heart and emotions are more or less the same, just expressed differently than compared to love stories years before us.

Getting back to cream of the topic that when Anu use to call me, she mostly had a situational busy surrounding to make a call. This aided in a mental barrier in the conversation which did not go frictionlessly. The surrounding mostly consisted of her hostel mates, colleagues or most importantly her parents.

For example if Anu asked me a question in a telephonic conversation, and while its my chance to reply to that question, she use to immediately start guiding anyone else present in her surroundings. And then when I asked, “are you listening to me or the other person?” Very smoothly she use to reply, “yes I am listening to you only”.
But then on asking more, she had no clue what did i just informed her.

And for counter example, if I am asking Anu something, then due to the Partial Concentration, she did not actually listened to what I asked. And thus made me repeat the same dialogues I spoke again and again which boiled my blood more. Her easy escape was to blame it on Network Companies, thus All network companies, if you feel why I am so much angry while calling customer care may be because someone is saying blaming their fault on you.

The overall feeling of this situation is that I use to feel that the person in her surrounding is more important than me. But on her denial to accept this theory, I use to urge her to give full focus on me. She use to say yes, but in next minute or two, she would again start replying to people in her surroundings. Thus this re-occurrence of situation even after correction was termed as “PARTIAL CONCENTRATION”.

The human mind works differently that emotions are concerned. When logically human mind asks for attention and is happy with what is being provided, it stops to wonder. But when mind is unhappy it works more in various directions, where it probably shouldn’t have gone. Thus in these conversations I use to ask Anu to avoid PARTIAL CONCENTRATION while talking with me. She use to agree but then follow the holy ritual path of Partial Concentration.

Then my mind wanted to test the theory what it has formed already. Dose the person in her surrounding is really important than me that she is giving importance to guide, where the sugar is? or has the water filled in toilet tank?, rather than talking about the present topic which discussion was going on.

While mind is buzy in formulating equation, the emotions are working on a very different and parallel scale. Instead of discussing the current issue of being upset, emotions directly changed from a state of ‘like’ to a state of “anger”, from a state of ‘patience’ to a sate of “frustration”, from a state of ‘abundance’ to a state of “dominance”.

Instead of expressing what I feel (which she would not listen due to the Partial concentration phenomenon already) I use to get angry on her and shout on her. And mostly assume the surrounding as my enemy who m I have to share my precious newly found love with.

This use to cause a harsh conversation and then we use to fight more and keep the phone down, sometimes with more force that collecting part backs and switching it on again was a matter of more difficulty than our relation itself.

With years of being together and so, called understanding each other, I assume the feeling doesn’t exist anymore. But as people say, GHOST OF PAST NEVER DIE. In the marriage occasion, when today ANU is kept away from me, buzy in various pooja a day before marriage, she called me at 1.30pm, but even in that call instead of actually talking with me, she started to talk with her mother and father in the background. The years long feeling of self named phenomenon came back. The insecurity that weather the person next is more important or me came back.

We fought and disconnected the phone, did not destroy it this time as they were earned by the money coming out of our own hard work. An hour later I received her call again, asking “what the matter really was?”

There is another theory that with years the relationship gets stronger, or we tend to understand each other more. But seldom this theory is true, I know with years passing the courage to face each other increases and if going on a progressive route the relationship becomes open or close with the passage of time. Former in our case, she asked “what is the real issue with you?” and I replied, “I am really feeling insecure, as if the person surrounding you is more important to you than me itself”

This time she replied, “My love, I am with everyone and this ritual is important to me as I dreamed of it from my childhood. And there is no chance someone is taking your place in my heart. Love will not have a comparison between you and someone but it is abundance that you have given me that I am here to spread it on behalf of you.”

This was an instance which satisfied both mind and emotion to a calm phase. With years, the relationship dose not get stronger, but we have the courage to tell each other the simple truths in life which we lied and dogged in the beginning of the relationship.

Neither I was able to express before I was insecure, nor she had the courage to tell the truth that yes the surrounding holds a momentarily important place. And when these small truth came out, a fearless comfortable zone was created which people misunderstood that relationship gets stronger with time.

Today I would say, that the self discovered phenomenon of “PARTIAL CONCENTRATION” still exist but we found a way to overcome the insecurity part of the equation.

And till we keep discovering a “fearless comfortable zone” in different aspects of our/any relationship, I am sure the relationship will survive all the odds in life 🙂

#tapishdongre #utsp

Untold Stories 73: The Racist Zone

 

When I haven’t seen a Ghost for almost 26 years of life, or if we haven’t seen any Ghost for a century or two then the believe system that the GHOST EXIST become rare.
More ever When Preachers of Science constantly keep explaining GHOST don’t exist, then even in theoretical Probability if at all A GHOST comes and visit us, we sometimes again doubt the Existence of GHOST.
Or probably make fun of the Ghost or just Ignore the GHOST as it was just one time event centuries apart.

Me an my wife as most of residents of Brisbane during the hot summer of February had adapted a new hobby to find time to
go for a swim.

On my last trip near Southbank at Brisbane which is a public swimming pool and an artificial beach, we swam and then sat waiting for a cool breeze to come at Quarter to four by the end of afternoon. There We saw two lady coming down from stairs. One holding a pram followed by other holding a baby.
As soon as the pram stumbled down the stairs slipped and missed by the lady’s hand, Both me and my wife got an instant reaction of care towards the pram. My wife shouted, “Oh MY GOD”

The next instant we realized the Pram was Empty and no baby was hurt during the pram slip. But the scene next happens was more Interesting.
The lady following holding the baby said in the next 10 seconds, “MORE BABIES DIE IN SHRI LANKA THAN HERE”
We both Looked at her in a puzzled face expression.
Then she said, “Malasian Airlines Kills more people than Pram Slipping”

In that event we guessed she just want to back insult us, but our face was still semi-puzzled.

Then the Last comment before her walking away from us was, “Curry! Curry Kills Babies”

That final moment we understood she was trying hard to throw a Racist Comment on us, but the wonderful thing was she took three attempts just to guess which country we belong to. Australia being a Multi Cultural Diverse country, the faces and features of many sub-continent looks similar. Thus though by looks its easy to group people into but difficult to exactly predict which country a person originally belong to. Then the mix of race i.e the inter country marriages adds up the confusion more. Apart from that there are several preachers of peace (I may include myself to be one) who constantly keep explaining people that Australia is not a Racist Country.

Thus on a example analogy for the GHOST Existence, we stayed in Australia for more than 3 years and well adapted and welcome by all communities equally. The concept of Australia being a Racist country became so myth like the Existence of a GHOST. That even if at all we found 1 desperately trying hard lady to be racist, we felt she was not racist enough.

This experience is something the whole world could enjoy by just visiting Australia once in their life.

The best part and the most funny part of this story is, We both don’t know which Race the two lady belong to. 🙂

Racist or Non Racist, Australia Holds lot of things to teach each other. And New Generation would be having more fruit to gain because of the Global Acceptance of Human Around the whole planet.
My be the theory of Whole Planet Becoming one Nation or Diss-Belief of Nationalist Thinking stills remains a possibility event which may occur in few hundred years.

Till Then, Keep Guessing as I still have strong ambiance to support the experience I have that Australia is a Multi Diverse Accepted Country.

#tapishdongre #utsp