Tag: #utsp

Untold Stories Post 75: Some Thing Like a Phenomenon

I have literally stopped writing UTSP a month before I was planning my trip to India in June 2017. Thus I thought If I would like to start writing again, I should start where I left. This UTSP is a personal page from my dairy written on 26th June 2017.

If this is the first time you are reading my written Untold Stories, then you can catch the previous one’s on my website tapishdongre.com and you can get all the updates of my future work by liking my page on fb. So Lets Begin….again…..

Personal Insecurity : a FORGOTTEN FEELING

This has happen before, and the long forgotten feeling came back.
In our engineering days, there was a phenomenon which use to occur again and again and again. And when so many again are used in a single sentence, its time to give the phenomenon a name, and the name is PARTIAL CONCENTRATION.

Anu (now my wife) and I use to have multiple telephonic conversation in our engineering days, Thanks to wireless mobile communication technology that love stories in early 2000’s had the advantage to verbal communicate frequently. And adding cheery to on top of the cake were “HAPPY HOURS” by the network company called AIRTEL, NIGHT CALLING by IDEA and 24×7 free calling by RELIANCE CDMA.

But though technology is aiding to the love stories, the human mind, heart and emotions are more or less the same, just expressed differently than compared to love stories years before us.

Getting back to cream of the topic that when Anu use to call me, she mostly had a situational busy surrounding to make a call. This aided in a mental barrier in the conversation which did not go frictionlessly. The surrounding mostly consisted of her hostel mates, colleagues or most importantly her parents.

For example if Anu asked me a question in a telephonic conversation, and while its my chance to reply to that question, she use to immediately start guiding anyone else present in her surroundings. And then when I asked, “are you listening to me or the other person?” Very smoothly she use to reply, “yes I am listening to you only”.
But then on asking more, she had no clue what did i just informed her.

And for counter example, if I am asking Anu something, then due to the Partial Concentration, she did not actually listened to what I asked. And thus made me repeat the same dialogues I spoke again and again which boiled my blood more. Her easy escape was to blame it on Network Companies, thus All network companies, if you feel why I am so much angry while calling customer care may be because someone is saying blaming their fault on you.

The overall feeling of this situation is that I use to feel that the person in her surrounding is more important than me. But on her denial to accept this theory, I use to urge her to give full focus on me. She use to say yes, but in next minute or two, she would again start replying to people in her surroundings. Thus this re-occurrence of situation even after correction was termed as “PARTIAL CONCENTRATION”.

The human mind works differently that emotions are concerned. When logically human mind asks for attention and is happy with what is being provided, it stops to wonder. But when mind is unhappy it works more in various directions, where it probably shouldn’t have gone. Thus in these conversations I use to ask Anu to avoid PARTIAL CONCENTRATION while talking with me. She use to agree but then follow the holy ritual path of Partial Concentration.

Then my mind wanted to test the theory what it has formed already. Dose the person in her surrounding is really important than me that she is giving importance to guide, where the sugar is? or has the water filled in toilet tank?, rather than talking about the present topic which discussion was going on.

While mind is buzy in formulating equation, the emotions are working on a very different and parallel scale. Instead of discussing the current issue of being upset, emotions directly changed from a state of ‘like’ to a state of “anger”, from a state of ‘patience’ to a sate of “frustration”, from a state of ‘abundance’ to a state of “dominance”.

Instead of expressing what I feel (which she would not listen due to the Partial concentration phenomenon already) I use to get angry on her and shout on her. And mostly assume the surrounding as my enemy who m I have to share my precious newly found love with.

This use to cause a harsh conversation and then we use to fight more and keep the phone down, sometimes with more force that collecting part backs and switching it on again was a matter of more difficulty than our relation itself.

With years of being together and so, called understanding each other, I assume the feeling doesn’t exist anymore. But as people say, GHOST OF PAST NEVER DIE. In the marriage occasion, when today ANU is kept away from me, buzy in various pooja a day before marriage, she called me at 1.30pm, but even in that call instead of actually talking with me, she started to talk with her mother and father in the background. The years long feeling of self named phenomenon came back. The insecurity that weather the person next is more important or me came back.

We fought and disconnected the phone, did not destroy it this time as they were earned by the money coming out of our own hard work. An hour later I received her call again, asking “what the matter really was?”

There is another theory that with years the relationship gets stronger, or we tend to understand each other more. But seldom this theory is true, I know with years passing the courage to face each other increases and if going on a progressive route the relationship becomes open or close with the passage of time. Former in our case, she asked “what is the real issue with you?” and I replied, “I am really feeling insecure, as if the person surrounding you is more important to you than me itself”

This time she replied, “My love, I am with everyone and this ritual is important to me as I dreamed of it from my childhood. And there is no chance someone is taking your place in my heart. Love will not have a comparison between you and someone but it is abundance that you have given me that I am here to spread it on behalf of you.”

This was an instance which satisfied both mind and emotion to a calm phase. With years, the relationship dose not get stronger, but we have the courage to tell each other the simple truths in life which we lied and dogged in the beginning of the relationship.

Neither I was able to express before I was insecure, nor she had the courage to tell the truth that yes the surrounding holds a momentarily important place. And when these small truth came out, a fearless comfortable zone was created which people misunderstood that relationship gets stronger with time.

Today I would say, that the self discovered phenomenon of “PARTIAL CONCENTRATION” still exist but we found a way to overcome the insecurity part of the equation.

And till we keep discovering a “fearless comfortable zone” in different aspects of our/any relationship, I am sure the relationship will survive all the odds in life 🙂

#tapishdongre #utsp

Untold Stories 73: The Racist Zone

 

When I haven’t seen a Ghost for almost 26 years of life, or if we haven’t seen any Ghost for a century or two then the believe system that the GHOST EXIST become rare.
More ever When Preachers of Science constantly keep explaining GHOST don’t exist, then even in theoretical Probability if at all A GHOST comes and visit us, we sometimes again doubt the Existence of GHOST.
Or probably make fun of the Ghost or just Ignore the GHOST as it was just one time event centuries apart.

Me an my wife as most of residents of Brisbane during the hot summer of February had adapted a new hobby to find time to
go for a swim.

On my last trip near Southbank at Brisbane which is a public swimming pool and an artificial beach, we swam and then sat waiting for a cool breeze to come at Quarter to four by the end of afternoon. There We saw two lady coming down from stairs. One holding a pram followed by other holding a baby.
As soon as the pram stumbled down the stairs slipped and missed by the lady’s hand, Both me and my wife got an instant reaction of care towards the pram. My wife shouted, “Oh MY GOD”

The next instant we realized the Pram was Empty and no baby was hurt during the pram slip. But the scene next happens was more Interesting.
The lady following holding the baby said in the next 10 seconds, “MORE BABIES DIE IN SHRI LANKA THAN HERE”
We both Looked at her in a puzzled face expression.
Then she said, “Malasian Airlines Kills more people than Pram Slipping”

In that event we guessed she just want to back insult us, but our face was still semi-puzzled.

Then the Last comment before her walking away from us was, “Curry! Curry Kills Babies”

That final moment we understood she was trying hard to throw a Racist Comment on us, but the wonderful thing was she took three attempts just to guess which country we belong to. Australia being a Multi Cultural Diverse country, the faces and features of many sub-continent looks similar. Thus though by looks its easy to group people into but difficult to exactly predict which country a person originally belong to. Then the mix of race i.e the inter country marriages adds up the confusion more. Apart from that there are several preachers of peace (I may include myself to be one) who constantly keep explaining people that Australia is not a Racist Country.

Thus on a example analogy for the GHOST Existence, we stayed in Australia for more than 3 years and well adapted and welcome by all communities equally. The concept of Australia being a Racist country became so myth like the Existence of a GHOST. That even if at all we found 1 desperately trying hard lady to be racist, we felt she was not racist enough.

This experience is something the whole world could enjoy by just visiting Australia once in their life.

The best part and the most funny part of this story is, We both don’t know which Race the two lady belong to. 🙂

Racist or Non Racist, Australia Holds lot of things to teach each other. And New Generation would be having more fruit to gain because of the Global Acceptance of Human Around the whole planet.
My be the theory of Whole Planet Becoming one Nation or Diss-Belief of Nationalist Thinking stills remains a possibility event which may occur in few hundred years.

Till Then, Keep Guessing as I still have strong ambiance to support the experience I have that Australia is a Multi Diverse Accepted Country.

#tapishdongre #utsp

Untold Stories Post 72: Inception of Brilliance

(from writing weekly to writing monthly now)

Because My father had a transferable job, I was able to experience what I experienced. I always cursed the transfers but at last I am thankful I had them in past.

Recently The Popularity of Cursing Education System in India is Increasing Day by Day. Mostly the Education system in Primary/Secondary Schools along with the most popular mass production of Engineers in India. The discussion which was once local talk of diss-stress among school mates or pass-outs is now been done Globally. Seriously in Jan 2017 (shooted on very different times) I could find 6 presentation on very popular TED talks by very successful people in their respective field pointing out, researching, digging and explaining why the education system in India is worse.

Various presenters also explained In-spite of Poor Education system, Indian Brains create Excellence when placed abroad. This post is of-course not explaining those points as you can find them on TED Talk by browsing on Google/Youtube or TED website itself. Untold stories posted by me at least are more about the learnt experience by individuals on very small detail topic which is untold because it is either so small or extremely simple that mostly remains unnoticed or mind just ignores it.

My school days in Kendriya Vidyalaya, Eddumailaram were though struggling, but were very different than what I observed and experienced in other KV’s attended by me. Constantly we were told something and fed into our unconscious mind that “KV STUDENTS ARE THE BEST” On a random day the school Principal would take a mic and explain we have the best resources for you and we will always be working hard to get you the latest technologies. This school by location was in a very aloof area, I mean to say there were not enough competitions where we could interact or cross compare and confirm that what our Principal is saying is true. We observed our surrounding which looked clean, technologically high, teachers wise well resourced and thus we believed what ever is told to us is true. The next things was that we learned sharing, and thus even if 1 student achieved higher goals which were definitely impossible to achieve by all as everyone had different talent. But by the law of sharing that person was made to stand on a stage, appreciated and then asked to share the victory with everyone. The students being obedient and non selfish that time use to share their victory. And instead of Reporting one student from this School scored high or gained the victory, the reports were made that KV EDDUMAILARAM HAD WON,i.e including all teaching non teaching staff and student had won the award. We were inside the Inception of Brilliance. We all believed we are brilliant students and thus worked hard to achieve excellence.

After that when I moved to other KV’s again due to my father’s transferable job, I met people and teachers who would quote, ‘…….this is the reason why people say KV school students are dumb.” “………. this is the reason why we don’t have enough technology and resources”
That was the first time I learned or believed that yes these are the reasons why we are dumb or week. But years spent in KV YEddumailaram kept my mind strong that We are Brilliant Students, only here there might be lack of resources..

After years of this incidents I forgot all the points I momentary believed to be true. On a phone call with my mother Tejashri Milind, she quoted a recent appreciation that “Even with limited resources, government schools education and non investing a huge sum of money in private expensive schooling your both kids(me and my sis Kritika Milind) turned out to be excelling in their respective fields”

That moment was like a Reality Distortion for me, I googled some KV pictures and found, that Infra structure of the Schools I studied was worse. I could see now the broken benches I used to sit 10 years ago are still there. Some School Teachers who may or may not be excellent in teaching/preaching are still in Board Websites of KV Group. We had only two computer labs having 6 to 10 working computers and 32 classes full of approx 40 students to use that resources. YES EDUCATION SYSTEM, TEST, PRESSURE, MUG UP SYSTEM, GIVING CHANCE ONLY TO TOP 1% HIGH SCORERS and KILLING THE DREAMS OF other 99% is a system which will fail in this advancing world which appreciates all possibilities.

But one teacher/one person in a life time, who momentary can sow a seed in a Child’s mind, who can create an Inception that the child, every child is Brilliant is what makes people Excel throughout the world.

Today I dont even Remember the name of Principal but I appreciate the wonder he Created which kept me and the whole school going.
Hope Every Student Meets a Teacher who have the power to create this Inception….

Untold Stories 71: Dialogues From The Past

As 2016 Ended and 2017 Begun, I have completed 27 Years 3 Months and 26 Days on this planet. I have no memory of How I was born, may be I should have asked my parents for more background stories, but I remember some of the dialogues personally spoken to me by the people whom I came in contact with in these years of social learning. So here is a List of Top The of them and a short Incident about how it happened and what did I learn.

  1. Maza Madka Voie, Me Kai Karu (Translantion form Marathi to English, Its my pot and its my wish whatever to do with it). Nitin R Dongre. While Breaking an Modearately Expensive Earthen Pot in front of all in anger this dialogue was used by Nitin R Dongre who is eldest paternal uncle to me by family of birth. Though Frightened in childhood by his actions I learned you can do whatever you wish to the things that belong to you, but to do that you need to earn them first.
  2. Think Big, Be the Biggest and Best Cobbler if you like to. Sanja R Dongre. My 3rd paternal Uncle said this while I was polishing a shoe and thinking low of myself at the age of 6, and he motivated me that if you think big, you will achieve big, so never aim small in whatever you are doing in life.
  3. Paristati, Paristati (Situations Situations) Nevedita R Dongre. I heard the dialogues complaining and escaping from things, coming from my paternal uncle’s wife. She was always blaming all the fault of their misery on situations and living an unhappy life as much as I could observe. I learned never to blame things on situations and take actions while modifying you plan as according to how the environment changes.
  4. Bairi Zali Manun Aiku Nai Yet (I am deaf so I cant Hear You) Old Granny Khobragade. Even after shouting instructions to My Great Granny of Maternal side, she said in her end of days that I am becoming deaf thus I cant hear you properly. I learned that your body is not going to be healthy for ever thus live every day of your life fullest till your body is giving favourable conditions to enrich your living.
  5. Dada Me tuza Sathi Kahi nai karu shaklo (“Dada” meaning Big Brother-a person’s nick name, “I couldn’t do anything for you”) Milind R Dongre. After his father’s death my father use to use this dialogue many a times during the day. I observed that while grandfather was alive my father lived his own life and tried monthly visiting his own father which were frustrating for me. But there were several moments where my father was angry on his father for the past deeds he did. Overall I learned that if you want to do something for someone or your decision is not do anything for anyone, the moment to decide is now. It now or never as regret is an emptiness which cannot be filled no matter what.
  6. My father is not dead, He was Assassinated. Nitin R Dongre. Deducting form the 1 year sever illness due to a head injury, my Grandfather died.  Medically it was a natural death but some said that he stopped eating food to save his wife from the pain to do his daily chore as for 1 whole year he couldn’t move at all. To this day various members of family have various theory of his death. A strong statement of his assignation in front of everyone present around the funeral ceremony by Nitin my Uncle depicts that human will believe  in the theories and knowledge he/she is having. Thus my learning form this dialogue was to expand and expose you mind of education to as vast boundaries as you can. Even if you are going to die believing an Inception, let that be a huge one.
  7. If you are born you are Invited. Ali Raza Cheema. Hesitant to go to an uninvited party I was not sure that I should attend a birthday party whom I barely know. But going to a Australian Island for the first time ignited a spark of curiosity in me. Thus I went to the party anyway. I learned that the statement is true, if you are born you are invited to see the beauty of the nature, meet unknown people and know the world more.
  8. You will Do it. I know that. P. Anand Rajsheker After 3rd consecutive attempt to write CSIR and examination to apply for PhD in India, I lost all hopes and then my professor said this world to me, YOU WILL DO IT, I KNOW THAT. I did that examination again and failed again, then wrote again and failed. I did not know that examination is/was worth my time or not but I liked the trust someone kept in me to push me forward, a trust which I never received from my teachers before. Thus may be I will write the exam again in future years or complete PhD by any other means. But I learned that trust is a strong motivational force.
  9. I cant Imagine you as a father, I just cant Ali Raza Cheema After observing my all time childish behaviour my Roommate and very close friend of that time in year 2013-14 said, I really cant imagine you taking care of another newborn, you are a child of your own thinking. I dint learn anything but that point made me think on the topic what kind of father I want to be and will I ever succeed. I guess I have to wait and find out…
  10. Gandiwar lat Marala Lagte Yechi. (YOU NEED A KICK ON YOUR ASS SO THAT YOU CAN UNDERSTAND) Raghunath P Dongre I was not close to my Grandfather at all, but most of my strong memories are of when he was lying on the bed for 1 year after the head injury of his. I tried my best but could never understand what he wanted to say. His vocal chords made very funny noises instead of really saying any meaningful sentences. He use to regain his memory for a very short period of time and then forget everything, even who you are or who he himself is. I was never hesitant to do any of his work while he was in that condition. My own brain was adjusting the quotient of humanity vs scientific curiosity of my grandfather’s condition. I had the image of an well educated as well as M.A.L L B advocate level of literate man lying on a bed with no memory of what ever he studied throughout his life. Then one day when I was not really able to understand what he wanted to say, I was exposed to the worse Marathi language swearing coming from an educated grandfather who never used such words before in front of anyone, at least not in front of his grandchildren. That was shocking as well as an eye opener for me that the white collar fake image he had for the whole life is been shattered by just removing a part of his memory. Thus I learned and decided to try not to have a double face life and accept the both good and bad in me. Most important, never portray only one side of your image as both the positive and negative qualities I have, make me as ME.

Enjoy Your Year Guys. Though I did not achieve something today but I guess 1st Jan 2017 was the most productive day of my life, I learned a lot and am eager to learn more throughout the year.

Happy New Year to ALL

 

#tapishdongre #utsp

 

 

 

Untold Stories 70: Is there Baby Yet?

 

In around the year 2010-2011, my friend Bharatlal Choudhary had started a new hobby of reading books and actually implementing the strategies he read in those book to practice in his life and we being his social surrounding were treated as his experimental specimens.

After reading an article about “Positive Peer Pressure” he explained it to everyone what the theory said, “Peer Pressure isn’t always bad, infact instead of writing a GOAL on a paper and never see it for rest of your life, its better to tell it to your friends loudly. The way human mind and conversation’s are concerned, your friends and social surrounding will keep reminding you of the Goals by constantly asking if you have achieved it or not? Sometimes you will feel motivated sometime insulted but you will have a live time target reminders and the peer pressure that will guide you in completing your GOAL”

The Idea when expressed for the fist time seemed really stupid, but in those days we tried every experiment possible to use the time we saved from Bunking(not going) the University. He stated his first goal that he would buy a motorcycle Bajaj Pulsar 220cc by the end of next year. Telling you the result in advance: he failed very badly to meet the dead line, I dint mean to say he dint try enough because I have seen myself him working hard for the Goal he stated. But when analysing the whole situation, the theory worked. During the whole time of the experiment and even after some months later his social surrounding including myself asked him several time “how the work to achieve your goal is going?”

After that our life began in different directions and I almost forgot that he still uses this theory to achieve most of his goal though first one failed. And this time, he meets his deadline and he did achieved most of his Goals.

Human mind today is so self centred that most of us dont try enough to know whats going around with others life, but this self centred mind also have a positive effect that we keep telling others what we did in past and what are our aims for future. The next time someone we meet again whom we have had conversation in past reminds us of some the words we spoke to them and again the theory of Peer Pressure seemed to be working.

I could have forgotten about the Peer Pressure Theory story until I got remained due to current two situations…

One of my current friend and a co-work said in a very jolly mode before signing off from work that Mate, I am singing off taking break and me and my husband will be starting to put full efforts in making a baby. By start of 2017 I want to have my own baby’ were her words. After that every-time I meet her the involuntary response comes in my brain to clear the curiosity and I end up asking, “IS there A Baby Yet????”

The second situation occurred that I keep telling my current co workers and friends that want to pursue PhD in Plant Biotechnology. That must be a dominant part of my conversation that even months after I met someone in a party a night before, people still asked me, “How is your search for PhD is going?” The peer pressure of these questions will surely puts me sad mood momentary but encourages me to apply more places and find options to achieve a PhD in near future.

Try the Peer-Pressure Theory yourself, and I will try if I could resist in asking, “Is there a Baby Yet????”

#tapishdongre #utsp

Untold Stories 69: My Dead Friends

 

6.9 is my Date of Birth, and this number also symbolises an adult mating position not ideal for mating, anyways lets get back story.

“Books are not papers and words, but a conversation between two individuals on a one to one basis not separated by some, but many years or generations.” -Author Unknown

Our basic life Ideas though we claim to be to be our own are mostly inspired or influenced by things around us. Smart thinkers may deny the above line, but more Smarter thinkers will at least give time to understand the point. More than understanding, its better if we could accept and then use the theoretical concepts, try it and then form our own.

For example, My Grandfather born in 80’s due to his upbringing or Influence of the India Pak division and tragedy in 1947, had very rude attitude towards Muslims in India. I dint really talk this with him face to face, but after his death, when I was able to read his Dairy Pages, I could interpret this information. Currently I dont judge him for his views but that defiantly Influenced me not to have those views and treat everyone equal, no matter of which believe system one follows.

Another example when I was reading a book of Chetan Bhagat Revolution 2020 (the writer is still alive by the way) I was so negatively influenced, may be because of my age or the long distance relation I was under that time that, I became super Possessive for a short period of time. I am happy that I could come out of that phase.

Similarly a student of Science or a Student of Religion, talk confidently about their respective subject without even getting the Idea that the words he/she is using are not of his own and been derived by the content of Books the individual is Reading or the content of People he/she is surrounded by.

By now you must have an Idea that Books or People who you talk to, have an influence over your way thinking. Most of Motivation speakers including your own mom advice you to be aware of what friends circle you choose, as most of the time, you become an average thinker of sum of the Circle around you.

Now choosing a Right book is also important, its like you are choosing a Dead or Alive friends which at least for some time will have a little impact on you.

Most of the books I choose to read are of writers who are no more alive, but through their books I can have a one to one understating that what kind or type of thinking they had in their time. They are My Dead Friends and I am fortunate to have them. Like other Friends I don’t actually always have to agree with them, nor I have a compulsion to be in their company. but when I am in or out of their company, I feel like slowly I am a changed person.

Hope you have your Dead Friends too….name me some, introduce me with some of special ones…and Have a Great week ahead 🙂

#tapishdongre #utsp

Untold Stories Post 67: Searching Jobs Part 3: Australia 2013 to 2016

job-exp

A bad Workman always Quarrels with his tools. Similar happens to most of Middle class teenagers in India. As their whole life the funds are coming from home for their education, they never learns how to earn and thus a person knows only the theoretical part of knowledge which is been taught in School. The things which are not being taught includes rejection, re-rejection, improvement, and re-re-rejection and building up yourself together to ReFace the Issue.

After entering Australia. The first thing I did was to understand how the system work. How would I get my 1st job here and now along with studies I needed to earn. In local surrounding the first the first advice and sometimes the final advice you get is to browse internet and search for Job across the websites Gumtree and Seek dot com.

When I started searching for job on these website, on the left of the screen menu’s came, which type of job you would like to apply for? The options ranges from simple category like Carpentry, Gardening, Cleaning, Laundry the words which I could understand to most complex like food and beverage attended, barista, Consultant.
The fields of jobs include Hospitality and Tourism, Trade and Service, Construction, Retail, Sales, Educations and Teaching and the list followed.

When I tried to read the job specification each time, more and more I was able to understand that I have never done any of these in my life. The only thing I did was go to school/college and came home blaming my parents how tough life is.
I started thinking after clicking the job criteria after each and every job that I really don’t have the SKILLS to do these jobs. I never learned this in India. We were only trained how to battle on theories and logic that we fail to understand that to build a bench over which we are sitting it requires crafting, to enjoy the air from a fan or air con, it requires someone to work in Assembly line. And even to eat the food what we just eat in our tiffin, a manual labour is required to prepare them.
I remember fighting with even the Security Guard of my school and college to get permission for late entry, but on that day I dint even had a skill to become a Security Guard to stand on someone’s door.

In Australia I came to realise that your 12 years of Scientific education in Schooling and 4 years of Engineering is of waste when you cannot find a single work environment to earn and feed yourself.
The next advice from friends came was when you cant make it, fake it. Fake your complete resume and Get the job. I even tried that, but internally my heart was afraid that on an interview there are many things I am unaware what if they actually ask how to do it, I would have no clue how to respond to it.
Unfortunately the fake resume could not get me an interview either.

The next thing I started was to go to door to door, shop to shop asking for jobs. I went to two Indian restaurant owners the first one was Masala Art at Roma Street, Brisbane. The Manager offered me job as Dish washer. The pay was 8$ an hour for start and then might be increased if my performance is good. I came to know let that be any country in the world Indians will exploit Indians. The pay was illegal but I was desperate. (Legal Pay that time for an adult was minimum 18$per hour). Manager called me from the morning a day after. After coming back to home and going to college the next day, it was decided that I would not be able to go to a job as on the same time I had my 1st laboratory Practical starting. I completed my Practical and went back running to the Roma street, the owner then told me that sorry you were not there when we needed you so now the job has been given to someone else. Thought illegal, though less pay, thought I agreed to self exploitation but even on this desperate occasion I missed a job as I dint go there on the right time I promised to.
That might be a shock in desperation that from that day for all my future jobs I made sure that if I sign up for a job, I am there at the location of job no matter how big or small the job is.

Next some of the Interview it was easily caught that I am faking it as the confidence was all gone. I was tired of all rejections and then out of blue moon one of random college-mate introduced me to her job location. The owner was again Indian, thus the pay was 18$ and hour on ABN which means I would be paying my own taxes. But for a start I was going to learn my first skill in life. Those days I did my first attempt for time management and I was able to successfully attend both my classes and Job. My Australian Carrier started as a Cleaner at a four start Apartment living called as “OXYGEN” on Roma Street.
I worked hard there, harder than even I thought I could. The pay was such calculated that sometimes I worked for 9 hours and got pay of only 4 or 5 hours. But still in desperation I did that work.

While coming from India I was happy that even I can even earn 25000Rs pay by being a floor Cleaner, but when I actually had to become a Floor cleaner, the words became so heavy. I was able to understand the fake attitude I had in my home country. Internally I use to feel low to do this job, though i must not but it might be the internal mentality set in India that Cleaning is a bad profession (which is not). But day by day I realised I am not made for this.
There was Job, there was Money, but there was not job Satisfaction. When I am not doing the thing which dose not interest me, the work becomes a burden, there is no pull by Interest only Push due to greed/need or money. The part of job which is most undisscussed is that your mentality and thought process is altered by your surrounding. You are surrounded by people at workplace which talk about only the things they know and by this, your knowledge comes to its limits by hanging out more time with these people. I was feeling that 8 to 9 hours a day is a major part of the day you are colleagues which constantly think small and in turn restricting your own capability.

Every day after coming home from both work and studies, I use to sit and apply for job. Understand the skill and re-built my resume. I must have applied 100’s and 1000’s job on that period of three to four months of end of 2013 and rejected every time but one. The one yes was a ray of hope and I realised that if you fail and keep re trying, there is a time when you have window to get your success, but if you stop the window can never open.

My first ever decent pay job was in RGIS as a Stalk taker. The job gave me chance to actually travel a lot with in my state. I was able to observe the nature is beautiful which I am unable to see in those 9 hours of trying shifts. I joined Sales with one of my Classmates and talked with many people in Australia, I was prepared for rejection in Sales, it build me more strong but I was also able to see various living standards, build in mind the way I would build my dream house. Understand how the local people of various living standard think, and with their hospitality I came to know that let it be India or Australia, the people of every class are present everywhere. They talk similar stuff, thought technology is different and way of doing things are different but people are people.

After that my focus completely shifted from Earning Money to Leanring Skills, I can cash my skills anytime with right opportunity but may times cash cannot install a skill in me. It requires a person to be both physically and mentally be present on the location where the magic is happening.
In two years I did more than 8 to 10 jobs. The difficult term to understand called “Food and Beverage Attended” was mastered to such a level that for 1 year I was able to Supervise and Manage 10 to 20 Food and Beverage Attendants working for me in a common goal.

In year 2015 for a short duration of 3 months I also established my own company, though it wasn’t successful as I had to learn a lot before handling my own, but it was an experience of a lifetime

Today I am ready to go back to the Theoretical world, of the Biotechnology, research, development but as better person that I would have been if I was only an Academic.
So even today I sit and Apply to various zones of Jobs as my mind is always Hungry to learn more and more and more….

All the best for all readers who might have found the job which Interest them or still searching for one, but remember if you fail for the 100th time, never stop trying because the 101th time might be a chance that your window of opportunity opens welcoming you in…

(P.S The simplest and toughest job is to be a better Husband. Most exciting and mind blowing job is yet to come: To be a father…)

Have a Great week ahead Everyone
#tapishdogre
#utsp

Untold Stories 65 : Searching Jobs Part 1 India

 

Completed the last question of Last exam of my Engineering Examinations and I thought Its finally Over. The results were out
in couple of months and I finally Became ‘an’ ENGINEER. I was so happy that the whole pain of ups and downs of life have completed now. Now I will get a Job and “SETTLE” in life. The fact I did not realize that Along with me almost 3000 other Engineers passed from my college itself.
This is Google Statistic which scared me that there are 1511 Engineering Colleges in India which results in production of 1 Million Engineering Pass Out every year in India itself. The statics of being just the one in 1 Million started a fear in my understanding of the system of Job Selection.

Dose all the companies in the India have the capacity to absorb 1 million engineers per year? Dose even 1 million people Retire or get fired per year? and most important one… Will I get a Job in Intake this year?

There is a stupid system in India for Job Intake during study period called “Campusing.” I am calling it stupid because some how all students assume that its University’s responsibility to provide the students with a JOB after completion of Engineering. They get angry on Management if they fail to get a job or speaking in their terms “if college fails to provide them with a job”.
Out of 3000 students passed in my college and average top bar is calculated and only those who score a minimum percentile above the top mark set for every year get a chance to sit in the job application process of Campusing. My heart pounded that My percentile score just touched the minimum bar and finally I was happy that I would be able to appear in the selection process.
Further an aptitude test was taken for each company. They questions were mix of both eazy and difficult one, thus you yourself cannot be 100% sure that you are selected in or not. So unfortunately I was not selected in any of the Rounds of INTERVIEW which is the next process.
My race to compete with the 3000 and 1 million felt halted on the 2nd step of the interview itself. Then its sad to say but I joined the team of students who blamed college to be responsible for me not having any job (must be my lack of understanding the system or amateurishness).

Out of the campusing rounds takes engineers on some of the pre calculated path. One to study Masters or Search for local Jobs which are no way related to our field of study.
Studing Masters with own money is expensive than that of Engineering Itself thus people often appear an examination called “GATE” which is elaborated as Graduate Aptitude Test in Engineering. If a person qualifies this exam he/she is enable to get minimum 8 to 11,000 Rs per month. Dropped out of the Camusing expectation Salary of 30 to 40,000 the new amount 11,000 still feels better than sitting at home and Being a MOOCHER.

Again referring to Google statistic on 2014 roughly 10,33,625 candidates appeared in the examination. This number is a sum of students appearing this year, reappearing this year and pre appearing this year for section process of that particular year. Its is again astonishing to note that only 16.84% qualified the Gate Examination. That indirectly means 100-16.84= 83.16% of students are incompitatnt according to GATE and are not selected.
Somehow this time I felt ashamed of being in Majority of the Group. As one door was closed the only known other door remained for me was to go and approach other agencies to find a job not related to my field but at least giving some money inside the pocket.
The first two agencies had job vacancy for a Call Center to be a Sales Representative.

The shame of taking money for parents every month even after Graduating was increasing month after month so as the frustration inside. With an unfocused mind and tornado of emotions its really difficult to take the right decision. So I am not sure the next thing I did was right or not.
I approached the advertised job agencies which welcomed me and asked me basic questions. I was happy to, though private but I am attending an Interview with HR. I answered the basic questions like “Tell me about yourself” “Why did you want to join this job” and any tasked based question like “Sell me this Pen”
The same evening I got a call form both the agencies I approached. They said “YOU ARE SELECTED” and made into first round of the selection process. The next round involves attending more real interviews and we will give you the links of all interviews if you deposit 500RS on our account.
My reaction to this statement were mixed as after completing the Engineering this was the first person who said “Yes I am selected” but hearing the remaining terms and conditions and about the 500rs to deposit. It felt like I am a Customer to Job agency. To test this theory I avoided their offer for few days and they kept calling me to deposit 500rs so that I could appear for real interview.
When I thought if Engineering Students are a Customer to this agency then I must completely know What I am buying?
Thus I asked for the first time boldly that what are the futher outcomes and when will I start working and earning money and if there is anymore hidden fees like the 500Rs you are asking me to deposit now. Where as in Job search we apply to get money not pay them.

Both agencies explained me their way of handeling the situation further. 1st agency said, after your deposition of 500rs we will groom you and send you to interviews of companies. Animals needed Grooming, I dint know in these days Humans do too. Further If you are selected there you will deposit your two month salary to us which will be in range of 5 to 8000 Rs. per month and then on you can have your salary deposited in your account directly.
The other agency offered me the similar procedure except the two months cut, they wanted 20% of my salary for the whole tenure I am working with that company selected by them.

I was already compromising form Joining to an Engineering Job to Joining a Call Center And Now top of that I had to sacrifice the amount of Pay which I didn’t even earn till now. Thus I am not sure I did right or not by taking this decision but I refused to both the offers presented to me and applied my energy and time in search of other options rather than the two “pre-definnd” paths called Masters or Job.
I knew that If I try enough I will find a way or an option which is the Road not taken by Engineers and finally I found something.

#tapishdongre #utsp
(As the matter was lengthy, this is first time I divided my post into parts. The next post will be made Monday 5th Sep. Sorry to keep you waiting, Enjoy your week ahead)

Untold Stories Post 64: Biographies

 

Someday on July 2012, I was sitting with my parents on the “Ghost House” (16th Samta Layout North Amabjhari Road Nagpur India). I call it Ghost House both because Grandpa and Grandma Died there as well as the physical and philological environmental condition of that house is just like only “GHOSTS” wants to live there.
I started with a conversation “Why all the example we ever talk of people are so negative, Either they are failed in life or Dint make it or stuck in some part?” “Why there no positive stories of people in our family or surrounding who actually made a difference? Live their life big?”

The Negative thought analization might be because I might have recently watched the documentary by Ronda Byrne The Secret and
seriously wanted to keep the garbage of negative thought and examples out of my life at that time. May be I was venerable or lost what to do next and all what I was loaded with was examples of failures.

My mom and Dad came with some examples for the people who could achieve some position in life but being in a middle class society of India, I could see less praise and more of Jealousness in the stories I absorbed that day. May be lets accept we all do that at some part of our life. Comparing our current position with others and being happy or sad over it…

Years later and some months before in the present timeline Kritika Zariya (https://www.facebook.com/angel.kritika.391) contacted me asking me guidance what pathway to chooze after completing 10th. “I would like to follow you” she said. Should she choose Biology or Mathematics.
At that point I was really not in right state to answer the question asked and accept Have I really reached that point that people can come to seek guidance from me? I modestly told her, I am still a student of life and yet did not discover my destiny.

On those days when I was at her position to choose from the carrier available, to avoid all failure and risk in carrier we had only two options, one to become and Engineer (which I did) and other to become a doctor which my sister Kritika Milind choose(Though she wanted to become an Animation Designer for a while).

All the examples except a Doctor or Engineer were neither exposed nor allowed to us at those time. But today the scenario is completely different. They have variety of Carrier to be choosing from. From animation designing to a gamer, for a sports person to a musician, from a Carpenter to Structural designer, From a local salesman to wholesale dealer, from Stalk trader to a Security Guard, from Fucking Saint to a Drug dealer you can and you are free to choose any Carrier in life you want.

That added more questions as Choosing Biology vs Mathematics was a difficult decision for me at time and how can anyone decide if we have multiple options to choose from. What if I choose the wrong carrier path?. As on those days we thought that that single decision to choose Biology or Mathematics will decide our carrier path. But truly speaking it ain’t true. Even after Completing a Degree or being mid way of a Carrier path in one direction you are free to choose and change your path. Or follow both if you like. It is well accepted now and only awaits you to accept that. One of my teacher said, “The only barriers holding you are the ones created by your own.”

And to really have the right motivation in life, or even to believe on the above point is right, the mind has to get familiar that this is possible. One of the way is by Reading BioGraphies. BioGraphies of famous and unfamous people. They tell us all possibility in life and timeline always brings us new possibilities.

In school we only learn The discovers of Electric Bulb, E=mc.c, Great painting by Picasso, but we are not exposed to did Edison ever fucked the wrong girl in life and how did he came out from that situation, Did Einstein ever had problem in reading things, Did Picasso had to choose form Biology or Mathematics and how did he came over that issue and chose Art?

Everyone though famous or unfamous has ups and downs in their life and reading Biography gives you a small hope that when he/she can get out of that situation, I am no one smaller that them, may be made to something Big and one day I will achieve it.

That small hope to accept all possibilities can lead you many undiscovered places. And one day you will stop comparing your story/success/carrier path with others because you will be happy and satisfied with the one you own yourself.

Just start your journey, And keep taking decisions according to time and situations…May be you are on the road not taken, May be you are the Discoverer

Have a happy Week Ahead 🙂
#tapishdongre #utsp

Untold Stories Post 62: The Unavoidable Question?

 

Its 2016, we all know that.
The thing which we all doesn’t know is that in my 26 years of Life on planet earth, and After doing 18 Years of Education,
and even coming and Living on Australia for almost three years, People Still ask me “Mr Tapish Dongre what Caste Do you Belong?”
Probably running away or Avoiding this question is not possible I guess for now. Its high time I get prepared to answer this question.

On a recent chat with a ex fb friend Naina Deshkar, she asked me which Cast do I belong, and I effectively dogged the question like every educated person can do.
I said in 2016 who believes in Cast system? Then she went on asking a confirmative question mentioning a particular Cast or Tribe, Do I belong to this cast or not?
Initially it pissed me off and I just unfriended her. But this question again disturbed me for the whole week. It was unanswered as well as Unavoidable now.

I am a story teller and there are not much ways I could express my anger and frustrations except telling stories, may be someday some reader may understand my projectile.
But for now, Naina Deshkar, Allow me to screw you up and explain you the system I understood till now, but before that let me tell you two stories,
1) which is commonly heard
2) which I created to explain the situation further

On a lovely sunny day, Two cats were fighting for a loaf of Bread. The Monkey saw this from his tree and decided that I can
take advantage of this situation. He came in front of cats with a Beam Balance and then said, as you are already fighting on loaf of Bread, let me help you and using this Scale(Balance), I can distribute the Bread
equally among you two. The cats in anger couldn’t decide properly and trusted a third person “Monkey” to be Judge when actually his involvement was none.
Monkey purposely divided the Bread in to “UNEQUAL” parts. When he weigh the new slices on a scale he conclude that one piece is bigger than other thus to make it equal let me have a bite form the bigger piece.
Monkey again purposely took more bigger bite that he was suppose to make it equal, therefore the bigger bread piece became smaller compared to other and then monkey said, now the other piece is bigger than the first one
thus let me have a bite from the bigger piece so that it makes the scale equal for you too. Slowly Slowly using this trick Monkey ate all the Bread and Cats being angry on each other could not even Blame Monkey and have no Bread at all.

In my story most of you must have understood by now that the two cats are two greater division of Indian Society being Schedule cast on one side and General on other. The Bread is the Resources (Jobs, education, Infrastructure, Living Commodities).
And we fail to recognize Monkey the friend of both Cats is the GOVERNMENT we respectfully support.

My second story continues with the first one.
On a lovely Sunny Day, Generations ahead form the first story, all the Cats were getting smarter by understanding the Monkey’s trick and getting mixed so that in future Monkey dose not eat the bread like last time. The only difference was internally the Cats really wanted to fight on the Loaf of First Bread that the two cats
were fighting on the first story. Group of Cats even declared the first fighting cat as LEGEND and started to pray on his photos and started building statues of first fighting cat. On a particular day of the year they even started celebrating the “Legend cat’s” birthday and death day. Burning candles on Street, Celebrating with joy and sadness on particular day.
Do you think Generations of Monkey were not smart enough? The first monkey trained his son, and he trained his son and Generations of Money belonging to same species trained each other that how can still we benefit on current bread as well as let the Cats forget about who actually Ate the first Bread.
The monkeys sometimes supported one kinda cats in speech and also funded the other type of cats. Monkeys also showed the respect for the Cat Legend and started constructing more of his statues and allowed other cats to follow his memorial birthdays and death days.
Monkeys modified the “Legend Cat’s” initial plan constructed a system where there will be direct or indirect inequality and the Cats would keep fighting with each other and generations of Monkeys will benefit from this system. Some cats wanted to stay out of this generations of Cat fight and even tried to avoid this mess. But the devotional cats usually use to convince the free educated cats to come and join their battle.
Educated cats now use to fight more effectively than the uneducated on, Ohh sorry let me rephrase Literate cats use to fight more effectively than the illiterate one. You know on a Wednesday 27th July 2016, one of the Legend follower cat asked the free cat, which side of the fight dose the free cat belong? In frustration the Free cat wrote the story of Cats again 🙂 lol

I sometimes wish I could change the situation but most of time I stay away for the “Cat Fight” but even to stay away I had to learn and understand about both the cats and their current situation.
Studying in Co-Education I never had to face Caste-sim similarly even staying in Australia for 3 years I never faced Racism. But if a cat from India persist me answer a question which Cat Community I belong so Today I have an answer.

Initially I thought the Cast division system is limited to Hindu Society as for which one of the creation is started to believe with the books classifying Varna System. Then I discover that there is Schedule Cast and Schedule Tribes in Christianity too.
As per my knowledge I might be wrong but most of religion of India have their own division of labor system which divides the Society and even permits a human to look down on other.
A person just born in a particular cast can either feel proud to be in the cast if he/she is higher to the hierachy system and also for his whole lifetime looked down and feel pity or ashamed if he/she belong to a lower cast in the Hierarchy.

We all know the Legendary Cat Dr. B.R Ambedkar on 13th October 1935 was popularized to have started wast campaigning Against the Cast system in India and many might have feel supported or offended on the speech where he speaks “I deny to follow a Hindu religion which treats me by any circumstance lower to other human being.”

I am not a fan or a follower of the Legendary cat as there is lot of change in the system since 1935 to 2016.
But as its is asked so I would like to reply to a Legendary Cat followerNaina Deshkar‘s question in her own Legendary Cat’s style that: I deny to follow and accept any fucking religion which treats one human upper or lower in socialistic placement over other.
As of today 31st July 2016 on my full understanding of consequences that will be followed I want to clear that I belong to No Cast nor any Religion. I am happy to live without them.

‪#‎tapishdongre‬ ‪#‎utsp‬