Category: My Articles

These are the writings like poetry story or fiction that i wrote personally

The Flight

Usually, an airplane, a train, a bus, or simply any vehicle is just a mode of transport. But today I want to write about just a few moments before taking that transport.

For my story, we arbitrarily start the night before I was going to take my first flight to Australia. I had to catch this flight from Bombay (Mumbai as it is now called, though internationally people still remember it as Bombay), while I was living in Nagpur. Approx 800km distance in between them.

So the night before my first flight I took a Train from Nagpur to Mumbai and moments before the start of the journey, there were tremendous emotions flowing all over the place. First I was going to miss this train. And the emotional trauma still follows me to this date, that feeling of what if I will miss my first International travel opportunity only because I am going to miss this train. Randomly I get the dream that this will happen again even though I am over 10 years residing in Australia.

There were more, more emotional pieces of baggage. On one side, completely opposite side of the platform were my parents and sister who arrived at the train station before me. On another side, were in an autorickshaw on the completely opposite side of the platform trying to enter the train station while the train was already ready to leave.

At this moment I was going to get separated from my girlfriend (now wife) and there was neither time nor the opportunity for an informal goodbye kiss. And the recent time I met my parents they still remember (actually complain) that I did not say my goodbyes properly.

For the next 5 mins I ran, I ran like a maniac. Holding a fully filled 30kg checking bag while my girlfriend was running behind holding my cabin bag which actually had my passports and boarding tickets. The train has already started moving and somehow I jumped in a running train leaving so many emotions behind (as well as my checking and bag). I saw my parents, girlfriend, and probably the riksha-wala running behind me. (Ya we forgot to clear the payments for the autorickshaw and my girlfriend gave him money later on.) They all chased after me and pushed all my luggage one after the other and I did catch the last Duronto Express from Nagpur to Mumbai.

On the train, I did think I am leaving behind the frustration of joblessness, and the emotionally challenging bond that I and my girlfriend had at the time. And I am leaving behind several unsolved undiscussed conversations with my parents where I was upset or it was just teenage anger. But as soon as I boarded that train, there was some sense of relief.

Several years later if I would talk to a psychologist about this situation, I bet she will discover that I always had that fight or flight mentality where I am mostly running away from my problems rather than facing them head-on.

Some situation that night and the day I caught my flight seems so stupid now and remembering them feels so awkward. For example, in Mumbai, I met my collegemate and a very good friend Bharatlal with whom I used to share the deepest of my secrets. I took out all the Indian currency in my pocket and gave it to him saying, “What use I will have of this abroad ?” (I agree I was stupid, I did not know there are currency exchange counters at all international airports). To this day my friend remembers this dialogue “Money from one country will be just like papers in another.” Probably we both were stupid at the time. Or as a famous comedian rightly said, “ALL FRIENDSHIPS ARE DEPENDENT UPON MUTUAL IGNORENCE.”

But that time I had several issues with the people whom I was surrounded with. Bharatlal knew that. And he also knew that I am also scared to go to Australia as well. Hopeful as well as scared. Before getting inside the airport, he took out his half-broken MP3 player and gave me his headphones with a tuned-in song, “AA-ZAA-DIYA (Pairo ki Bediya)” from the movie UDAAN.

Music has the power to drill down as well as build up a person’s emotions. Thus, that is the only thing I focus and hold on to while remembering that stressful emotional rollercoaster time before my first flight. The song AA ZAA DIYA….

How was your experience on taking your first flight or first step into a new journey ???? Please do share in the comments section below.

See you in the next post or next life, whichever comes earlier.

-Tapish

Diet Plan for Myself

Current Weight 102KG

Target Weight 73Kg by the next 365 Days

PLAN for the next 10 Days – Then Big reward.

Think like Bharatlal, Cheat your brain like he did, but in reverse.

Keep Chewing Something, Buy Chewing Gums, Trick your brain that you are eating food.

Eat Healthy ONLY.

Zero Sugars, no Soda.

Lots and Lots of Water.

Tea without Sugar and Milk

Small Steps, 10 mins of Exercise per day.

Reduce Carbs.

More Proteins.

Re-do the Planning in the next 10 Days.

Peace Out !!!!

Inner Child Wounds

I struggle myself a lot to cope with a few of the below-mentioned “Wounds” but after reading the comments under the original post, I discovered I was not alone. Indians by default live under the influence that “Parents are the Perfect Beings” and thus mosty anytime I expressed this to my classmates and colleagues, they did find a fault in me in even expressing my feelings on this subject. Then I discovered more about intergenerational trauma and the ability to cope with it. It is nice to know that even other people who have faced similar issues were able to come out of their childhood traumas and live a decent life for themselves and the next generations. One of the best lines I could read in the comment section by Markus Wilson was, “I forgive him, or should I say, I forgive myself for wanting him to be more than he could be.”

Hope I could fix the repetitive stories in my head or at least give them a proper ending. For a Better Future.

Cheers

Tapish Dongre

April 2022

Inner Child Wounds. Image Courtecy Facebook “The Soul Journey with Saraha Moussa”

P.S. You can read the original comments by clicking the link below. It will redirect you to the original post on Facebook. https://www.facebook.com/377700549450190/photos/a.377728092780769/1045385662681672

Perceptive Thinking on E-Baba’s Birthday

The Adam Project (Netflix 2022)

So 16th March 2022 about 00:00am I got the Google Notification that it’s “E-Baba’s Birthday”. For those of you who have not read the previous articles I wrote on E-Baba, he is my paternal Uncle having very high moral grounds in my perception.

With the notification came a moral dilemma, should I even wish him or not?

I know wishing any person on his/her birthday is a positive social activity. But to wish E-Baba there are various Caveat attached. The most prominent one was that I was somewhat angry with him myself. Don’t get me wrong, he still holds a high moral value as a perceptive being. But his clashes with his own family made him choose an action in the past where he left everyone hanging dry. His side of the story is true that he was hurt. But hurt people hurt other people, consciously or unconsciously. Thus when he had fought with his brothers and left the main house, there was no fault of us at that time, that we deserve his isolation. And for leaving me as a kid, unguided, that really made me angry.

In later years, due to good circumstances, now that he is making his efforts to re-console with his brothers and sharing happy memories of them being together, this, in turn, made me angrier. That, “all the years of anger that I had held on to, was that of no use or no worth”?

Watching this movie “The Adam Project” I was able to have another perception of myself. In a conversion in this movie, (exactly at the time of this picture above) it is expressed that we tend to be angry when we grow up, or tend to, not because we are really angry. But in fact, because we are sad. It is easier to be ‘Angry’ than to be ‘Sad’. To mourne from our pain and then to recover. Is easier to blame others and tend to relive the made-up stories than to face the hurtful truth. Since this whole month I am trying to accept my own one truth after another, so thought why not give this theory a chance too.

Instead of being angrier about E-Baba’s constantly changing actions, let’s consider him as a normal human being. A human being who makes mistakes.

And when I think it that way, I am able to think one step ahead of that where I was stuck all these years. And that is, We tend to accept the mistakes of people we love. Or in other words, we tend to ignore the mistakes of people we love and accept the person as a whole being. And whenever we are not able to accept a person as a whole, that is only because we are not able to ignore the mistakes that the person has done to us.

There again comes a choice in the present moment, when we are all alive, Not in memories but here in flesh and blood. Time for new bonds, time for new memories, time for new fights, and time for new love. I think I can get past this mental stuck and move in a new direction. Not a right or wrong direction, as no one could judge where our future lies. But at least one step ahead of our past stuck.

So somehow grabbed the number from my cousin’s sister and texted him, “Happy Birthday“

Unfortunately, this is not a complete story as it is rolling on this present timeline, thus even I don’t know where my or others’ actions will lead in the future, but till that time when my heart beats more than normal that compel me to write more about E-Baba, I can only Say it is “To Be Continued….”

See you in the next post or next life, whichever comes earlier.

Signing off for now

Tapish Dongre

Why?

Why?

Why? I asked, and he smiled. Ignored Probably as I was very small.
Maybe my age reflected an under-understanding of what I have asked.
Or the importance becomes negligible when strong question is asked by a kid.

Why? I asked again, at my teenage.
My rebellious age made it sound rude.
How can I ask an authority to respond to an action taken years back?

Why? I asked again in my twenties.
Tiredness and demand of Justification were there in my query.
The hurt of the Ego may be to the respondent that he didn’t answer yet.

Why? I asked again, in towards my mid-age.
Silly he thought, that I still needed an answer.
“I even forgot about it” was his reply.

How can you still remember? he asked,

“Axe Forgets but Tree Remembered” I replied.

If the story goes further I predict.

Why? I would ask again on his Deathbed

Expecting an answer, which he never can make sense of.

Why?

 

-Written by Tapish Dongre in the memory of the unanswered questions by people very dear to me.

Untold Stories Post 82: Muze Mummy K Pass Jana Hai (I want my mommy)

 

Don’t blame the Mom, it was an accident. It can happen to anyone. Unfortunate but true.
Don’t blame the Child, he was just curious to see the world. Excited, lost, but dint even realised when it happen.

The baby who can walk now, lost his attention along with the small palm grip he had with his mother.

Walked towards the most colourful distraction he could see in Super-Market as big as the whole word to him.

In this process forgot that his mother warned him multiple times, “do not ever leave my hand”.

The small soul started his journey towards exploration of the treasures what the world had for him.

Reaching to this magnificent destination, the child realised the mother’s warning.
But till this time, he is so away from his mother that finding path back to her on his own, seems to be an impossible task on its own.

The Baby did the best he could. Remembered the path he came from. Walked on it for so long. And finally came to conclusion. His has lost his mother.

Tears rolled down inside of him before it could be expressed on his face. He cried, yes because it was allowed, that’s what a baby can do.

Watching the baby alone, people nearby started to wonder. Not all came for help but one. She was a brave soul. Could understand the pain that baby is going through.

Picked him and asked, “Are you lost? Where is your mother? How dose she look like? Let me help you finding her.”

The baby felt relaxed for the first time. An assurance that he could be re-united with his mother.
An hope that everything will be alright again. With this hope and clearing his own cloudy thoughts, the child tried his best to answer the stranger about his mom.

The stranger woman did everything the best she could do. To sooth the baby’s life, few movements, for how so ever short it may be, count that time as life as true.

She gave him two toys to pay with. The baby was both happy and thankful for the gratitude. But only moments later he cried again and said,
“MUZE MUMMY KE PAAS JANA HAI” ( I want to go to my mother.)

The Woman tried every thing in her power to search for his mother. Told others, went on places the baby described and finally made a public announcement.
She will be waiting in a designated place along with the baby and urged the mother to please come and meet us there.

Baby had the stranger woman, her sympathy, her company and the two very beautiful toys she gave him. But the baby still cried, and shouted, “Muze Mummy K Paas Jana Hai.”

That was a long wait, a very long one, but finally on the designated place, a woman came running with tears on her eyes. She couldn’t take her breath properly, but she held on to her faith.
The baby said, “MUMMA” and they hugged each other.

I don’t remember properly what happen next. I know I am just a narrator of this story but no one told me in detail. As It has already been more than 30 years to this story.

The walking baby has grown up to be the perfect man. Explored the real world bigger than the Supermarket of his childhood. Met the another strange woman of his life who had enough empathy to commit life together with him.

Gave him two magnificent Kids that he never required another toy. He was happy. Living the perfect life.
And One unfortunate Day, his mother Closed her eyes.

Even at age 30, he was still a child.
Tears rolled inside of him before his eyes could shine.
He was quite this time to watch his mother go.
Few people around him who could actually know,
Whats going in his heart he wanted to say out a loud.
Even after years he had the same words in his mouth,

“Muze Mummy Ke Pass Jana Hai”
(I want my mommy.)

#tapishdongre #untoldstories #utsp
(Inspired by recent events in life of my former boss and very close friend. May his mother’s Soul rest in Peace. She was really a wonderful woman, I spend few meaningful chats with. And I actually cried before writing this story and again while reading the draft.)

Untold Stories Post (UTSP) 80: Marvel vs DC = Fictional Neutral Post

Stories were, are and hopefully will be my passion that motivates me time to time.

With my previous mention on multiple occasions, this must have come across that in current generation of Fiction Wars, I am a super Marvel Fan.

This gives me a strange opportunity to randomly meet strangers and connect with them sharing the same love for stories.

In my understanding Marvel has reached up to that limit where ancient literature like “Ramayana and Mahabharata” would have reached.

The character depth, story cross connection, multiple language translation, huge roll over of currency and love are the common factors I could get comparing various literature and Marvel universe.

I even observed that there is No Particular GOOD or EVIL permanent state of a character.

Dead-pool being the Villain of X-Men series is now a Hero having his own franchise.

Venom being villain in Spider-man series is now a comparative Good character according to 2018 story line.

This was similar to Ravana begin the Villain of Ramayana but later fiction, more research and ongoing work presented him as a good  devotee of God (Not that bad Man then).

Krishna being the super hero, smiled as Gandhari’s son death and sentenced to internal curse. (Bad present inside Good)

I can comment more by comparing Greek Stories and Bible or Quran, but at last results the same purpose. Stories to teach a lesson, to inspire, to learn, to entertain, to fear, to laugh and to connect with similar or dissimilar mentalities over the globe (and hopefully beyond).

Yes UTSP is mostly about personal experience with day to day scenario, thus let me divert in the above comparison and tell you another story.

I was working in Sun-corp Stadium and I met a guy who was leading the food retail team on that particular day. We started talking about fiction stories and then he said, he is a DC fan thus he is waiting for AQUA MAN release this year.

I replied I am as eager as he is, but I am also interested in next edition of Infinity War (which is Marvel Based story-line).

Suddenly he was firm and said, I don’t watch Marvel movies BECAUSE I am DC fan. The discussion went on and on about Marvel and DC.

Late coming home I realized, Fuck the shit.. I love both Marvel and DC. Being one’s fan docent mean I hate the others.

Many days later when I was watching the 2018 Venom, I meat a Marvel fan who hated DC fictions up to an extent that he would not support even the release of AQUA MAN.

And the next step I am doing in this post might be controversial but pattern seems to be true at my current understanding.

I am trying to develop pattern or similarities between religion and fiction. (Both having its followers, preachers, as well as extremist)

More I met with people I gained info that People following Marvel in general avoid DC and vice a versa.
Similarly people following one religion or faith try to avoid lessons and practices from other. And Extremist even try to pin down the non-followers of their own kind.

The time I was most glad was, while meeting people who believe in Peaceful co-existence. The people who like to put Political, Racial, Linguistic and Religions barriers aside and share a Smile together.

Being Atheist (agnostic actually) and Religion neutral gave me access and acceptance to people from all religion. And being Fiction Neutral gave me the entertainment from all over the industry.

And thus I even hope to meet more and more people who are able to keep the FICTIONAL FOLLOWER barriers aside and give chance to be entertain from more and more and stories, let that be from DC, Marvel or even M. Night Shyamalan’s Unbreakable Universe.

Who knows I might create a new genre in future years to have a fan following. But in all case, Do love each other, and Keep each others happy. Let only the Fictional Characters Fight. 🙂 We as humans can co-exist.!!!!

#utsp #tapishdongre